Switzerland doesn’t want your Grand Big Mac, Ronald.

Posted on by lauraanneayres

Color me red and white in prideful appreciation for the current Swiss backlash against the Grand Big Mac.

God bless your cholesterol-heavy heart Ronald, you knew that wouldn’t be popular here, didn’t you? You’re little tag line on the advert “only for a limited time” almost seems like “I am really sorry to have to advertise this in your exercise/recycling/good health-focused country. They are making me.”

Page two of the daily paper yesterday (this is the paper everyone reads, for free, while utilizing public transport, which the vast majority of us do) had this to say, “Criticism about the new jumbo burger.” The article then went on to tear the not-so-Grand Big Mac to shred(ded lettuce…ha ha, I couldn’t help myself). First attack was not on the ingredients or daily fat intake or anything a bit intangible.

They attacked the size. Simple, concise, efficient attack. The Grand Big Mac is 45% bigger than the regular one.

It was so Swiss and so brilliant. They go on to attack different aspects, but the crux of the argument is simple: this company is trying to make us 45% bigger like this burger. Eww. Gross.

Someone refers to the burger as “scandalous.” Someone else refers to the McDonald’s spokeswoman as representing “the calorie bomb.” Damn! The only redeeming component appears to be the half a head of lettuce we see in the Grand Big Mac’s debutant photo, but that is left out. No, every sentence is loaded with burger-busting explosives. Bravo.

This is why Switzerland has 90-year olds who hike in the mountains. This is why it’s fairly normal to see people on crutches throughout the year. These people are active and they are moving. They don’t want to add 45% to their meals. They want to be moving in a year, five years, fifty years. Also, they also like their meals; so they wouldn’t want to waste 3/4 of their daily food requirements in one go.

Go back and look at this blog post. Read all the things that contribute, daily, to the good health of the inhabitants in this country.

1) Utilizing public transportation – moving ourselves around keeps muscles functioning, oxygen flowing, and encourages social awareness (though some people fail miserably in this last area)

2) Recycling – keeps us from being a wasteful nation, focused on consumption without consequence. They don’t give us a choice here. You’ll recycle or you pay more because trash bags are expensive here…on purpose. Recycling is made easy and it’s just part of our daily lives.

3) Size control – ha ha. This is a bit of a sensitive subject. But, yes. Switzerland is hyper-conscious about keeping the, ahem, portions small. (Even of the portions of foreigners.)

4) Daily news – twice a day, we read the daily news. Why? It’s free. It’s presented to us not only via the web, but also in our hands. I cannot imagine Swiss transport without newspapers scattered here and there. This contributes to global, regional, and local awareness. It also makes for a well-informed society that is READING. Not bad.

5) Fresh vegetables and fruits – I have never seen people eating vegetables and fruits more in my life. Granted, we are spoiled. We have fresh veggies and fruits at our disposal all the time. You buy them on the run and you don’t even think twice. For example, I would never walk into a fast food place and grab fries for a train ride. I do, often, grab an apple and/or some carrots.

I’m not anti-McDonald’s. I am a huge supporter of the work done at the Ronald McDonald houses, by the way. But, what is the overall cost? For every Ronald McDonald house, doing amazing work, there are probably thousands of cases of coronary disease attributable to bad health habits encouraged by the first “McDonald’s Happy Meal.” Taking care of sick kids is really important. Keeping kids from getting sick…can I be so bold as to say it’s MORE important?

Nevertheless, I don’t think Switzerland was a great launch site for the Grand Big Mac, Calorie Bomb. Our golden bodies are a bit more important to us than your golden arches, in this case.

 

Writers, Fakers, Authors, Ghostwriters…cue Mark Twain rolling over in his grave

Posted on by lauraanneayres

I had a chat with an author this week – Diccon Bewes, author of various books (http://www.dicconbewes.com/). As we munched on rather lousy fish and a rather juicy burger, I asked Diccon his opinion about the debate over “writer” vs. “author.” I didn’t need to ask his opinion about “faker” vs. “author” because I’ve read his well-researched, carefully-crafted words.

He’s not judgmental about all the terms (like most are), but one of the questions really stuck with me. Are you a “writer” if you write emails?

I’m a writer. The book I wrote is a great book and I wrote every word, but I’m not an author. Diccon is an author. Diccon’s books are not riddled with blind-eyed grammar mistakes. As I freely admit, I wrote my book in three weeks (and revised many times after). Diccon painstakingly researches, interviews, crafts. I have an album of original songs that accompanies my book, which I co-wrote with my buddy, Jackson. I’m an opera singer. Diccon might have sung “Toreador” in the shower, but I doubt he’d claim he’s an opera singer. I think we’re both okay with being who we are.

Look, there are major differences (an English major, come to think of it) involved in many of these “titles.” There are also, for me, fundamental dangers and failures in using them in a flexible way. You are not an author if someone wrote your words for you. You are not a writer if someone wrote your words for you. You are a storyteller, even if it’s your own story, and that is fantastic. And enough.

I blame ghostwriters for some of this. They are doing wonderful, creative, expressive things…and enabling a falsehood to be promulgated. Ghostwriters have penned truly exceptional works that have been primarily attributed to people with name recognition/money. I do some translation work for a website that features ads asking writers to write entire books for 400USD. They must relinquish all claim and legal right to the work after the obligatory “here’s 2 months of paid electricity bills” given as a fee for surrendering their intellectual property. The “owner” of this slaps his or her fat cat name on the book and no one knows that someone else wrote the book.

Goethe wrote an entire book about a theory of colors. I’m fairly certain if I googled “books written by Honey Poo Poo” something would pop up. Ghostwriter/editor/person that does everything for me, please google Honey’s Christian name. Geez, welcome to 2014.

I know it’s hard to make a decent income from writing. Guess what? It’s really hard to make a decent income after you’ve sold your integrity.

For all of the writers who actually put pen to paper for a full 400+ pages, my hat is off to each of you. I’ve done it twice now and it wasn’t exactly easy.

For all of the ghostwriters who consciously allow people to slap a celebrity name on expressions, turns of phrases, research, beautiful dialogue, etc.? Honor your education, your talent, the gift you have with words…and be brave.

For those of you who think writing an email makes you a writer? Well, okay. I did hear the University of Fantasy Land Bachelor degrees are lovely. Covered in glitter, isn’t that write?

For the authors who challenge my brain to see, hear, smell, think, explore, examine…I have only gratitude.

BRAVERY PROJECT: Guest Blogger: Mary K. Stone – “I wasn’t sure I was ready”

Posted on by lauraanneayres

This is what I am saying, people. God willing, we do not fight World Wars anymore. We fight “little” battles everyday and Mary fought one. She was afraid to “put herself out there.” Haven’t we all been? Look what she did this time! (I say “this time” because the woman is a nurse. She has more bravery in her pinky fingerNAIL than most of us have in our entire bodies.)

Mary is a talented writer I met via Twitter. Here is her most recent act of bravery. Follow her, please, @WriterMKStone and her blog: . She’s a nurse. A wife. A mom. Trying to really make a difference. Bravo, Mary!

**

My brave act this past week was putting myself out there and joining the social media world. I launched my website, blog and Twitter account. Just a few months ago–as an unpublished author–I wasn’t sure I was ready to take those steps. I’m fortunate that my friends, family, and writing community have been supportive. But announcing something I’m still aspiring to be to everyone in cyberspace? Yes, definitely scary! In such a short time it has been incredibly rewarding and I feel like I am now part of a global writing community. In fact, putting myself out there is how I connected with you and made it to your wonderful blog!

Climb every mountain…or not – One year ago, I went to Grand St. Bernard

Posted on by lauraanneayres

Today will be a “good luck getting off the couch day.” Last night, InterNations successfully hosted hundreds of people at a gorgeous venue in the middle of Zürich. As usual, I was smiling and semi-suffering at the door. In spite of the chronic back pain, it’s hard to help myself. See, it’s the people that have sucked me in. I really care about a lot of them. When I ask “How was your week?” I’m listening to that answer.

But, this morning, I woke up and felt the effects of my “care and concern.”  Major back pain lighting my back and neck up like a Christmas tree. Whatever. No biggie.

Then iCalendar and Timehop popped onto my computer screen and reminded me what I was doing 12 months ago: “St. Bernard w-” (I took away his initial).

it was one year ago that I went to the Hospice of Grand St. Bernard for the first time.

That kills me more than the back pain. I was climbing a mountain a year ago and today I can barely carry a purse. I won’t be climbing a mountain any time soon, okay. I get that. So, I can cry about it and feel sorry for myself OR I can smile and pay homage to what made the Hospice of Grand St. Bernard weekend truly exceptional.

Duh. I always do the smiling thing. Here goes.

1) I snowshoe’d for the first time and 2) I climbed a mountain over 2400m for the first time.
(BTW– those things happened simultaneously, which was not easy, AND I did it in 2 1/2 hours.)

3) I visited the Valais for the first time.

4) I drank the addictive Hospice GSB tea for the first time.

5) I kept Canonical hours for the first time.

6) I attended Mass IN FRENCH for the first time.

7) I felt truly at peace for the first time in my life (it was an amazing 2 hours).

8) I had a birthday party with plastic utensils on a wooden floor for the first time.

9) I read “Swiss Watching” for the first time.

10) I stopped a man from having a commitment phobic tirade for the first time because…

11) I told him “I love you” for the first time.

12) I literally saw and heard multiple avalanches for the first time.

13) I took a car ride with complete strangers for the first time.

14) I got frostbite for the first time.

There’s something in both of my books. Emily and Daniel are on a mountain climbing when Emily loses her footing and starts to fall. He tells her to stop, plant her feet, stand up, and move forward.

That was real.

15) I learned how to stop myself from being overcome by fear for the first time.

It was an amazing retreat from this life. I’ll happily revisit it a lot today as I am clutching my heating pad and Ibuprofen.

I was winning today, last year. That means there’s hope to win again.

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BRAVERY PROJECT: Guest blogger: Maggie Miller, “She is alive…and I am by her side.”

Posted on by lauraanneayres

I have been profoundly moved by the bravery from a family that I met years ago. Please get a box of Kleenex and read Maggie Miller’s story of bravery (yes, you are BRAVE, Maggie).  Pictures will be added as soon as possible. Thanks, Laura Anne  Follow this project @BeforeYouBook #BraveryProjoect

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Bravery. It doesn’t come from the inside. I know. I am often described as being “brave,” but never once have I ever felt brave. I have felt terrified. I have felt overwhelmed. I have felt hopeless and lost, but never once have I felt brave.

Bravery is something that is perceived from a distance, a retrospective observation of another person. So many people will tell you of my bravery, even those whose bravery I see. Yet, I cannot feel it. It’s not that I’m distant or egotistical. It is the truth that those who are brave, even those who decide to be brave, are often many things, but brave is not one of them.

 

I have a daughter, Sarah, whose whole life has been one big brave battle. She is the bravest person I know. She has been poked, prodded, examined, stabbed with needle after needle, held down against her will, fought back, cried and turned around and smiled and laughed. That is brave. I can only imagine the terror in her nightmares. What do you expect when a child’s own mother, the one being an infant is truly dependent on, forces her to swallow medication or stabs her with a needle or holds her down herself to let others do these things? The answer is simple, and oh so painful. The only thing you can expect is terror. Accompanied with the sympathetic nervous system fight and flight response; and of course a whole lot of tears (mostly mine).

 

But she faced it. She did it and she is amazing. She had no choice. She was forced to be brave. And I held her little body and kissed her little head. And she wears her battle scars, both physical and emotional, a little embarrassed (though she shouldn’t be), but she is alive. And she is well. And I am by her side. The war might be won, but there are still battles to fight. She struggles every single day. I help her when she falls, but mostly just watch her grow; nudging her along this unfair road that is her life, intervening to make her challenges a little lighter. Her courage is astounding. I see her as so much more that I could ever be. I tell her that it’s going to hurt but she has to do it anyway. She does it. Reluctantly, but she does. We bribe the crap out of her.

 

Being brave is not always the immediate choice when faced with a problem. It usually only appears after you’ve decided to do something, stand up for what you believe, fight for your life, etc. It often comes when the other choice is not something you want to face or accept. Fight the cancer or die. Fight for freedom or be a slave. Bring health care to the masses or have death and disease run rampant. Overthrow the corrupt system or be corrupted. Often eminent death is the deciding factor in becoming brave. In my case, I was never brave; all I did was take care of my baby the best I could. I have fought for her life and I continue to fight for her to live. Children deserve every opportunity to be healthy, educated and happy. There is nothing I wouldn’t do to make sure my children have those opportunities. I only appear brave because I have done the unfathomable. I cared for a sick child when there was little hope, when my own body was exhausted to the point of complete shutdown. I never slept, barely ate (though I easily gained more than 50 pounds). It was the single worst thing I have ever experienced. But it made me realize some things:

 

  1. I never, ever, EVER want to go through that again. . . But if I had to, I know I need to know what to expect. In the event of relapse we will be inpatient facing a bone marrow transplant and roughly 120+ days in the hospital with one very sick child, another terrified and neglected child (I wouldn’t leave her alone) and a huge emotional void in my spousal relationship, if we can find a match. I don’t look for the worst, but I have to know what could happen so that I will be ready if it happens. I hope we never have to face that monster again and we do so much to avoid it, including eating an organic diet and growing our own food as much as possible.
  2. I will survive if I miss a meal or a night’s rest. I will not just survive, but I will reset my body and be better off for the skip. It will be challenging and emotionally taxing, briefly, but I will survive. I always miss meals and sleep the night/week before a follow-up appointment. I used to miss the night before the testing to determine the current status of the cancer. It’s part of a whole mess of emotional train wrecks just before scans/checks we all call “scanxiety,” and it’s normal. At least in my world.
  3. I learned to live in the moment. We celebrated Sarah’s birth every month while she was in treatment. I had no confirmation that she would be one to live through treatment. I didn’t know how many birthdays she had left. I wanted her to know she was important and to “Celebrate Sarah” every chance I got. She was crowned prom queen alongside a slew of friends who gained their wings and flew away at the age of 2. No one told me I would be the one to be so fortunate to be able to wrap my arms around my baby and tell her I love her every day or so for the past 8 years. And my heart breaks for each and every parent who cannot. For every single child lost, through cancer or otherwise, because. . . No parent should EVER have to bury their child. One of my favorite quotes applies here: “Dance as though no one is watching, love as though you’ve never been hurt, sing as though no one can hear, live as though heaven is on earth,” (Souza) EVERYDAY, because you don’t get a second chance to live today.
  4. There are always going to be obstacles. There is no such thing as smooth sailing. . . At least not for long. Sarah faced a tiger in the ring of the coliseum and won her battle, but she didn’t come out unscathed. She has physical scars, cognitive scars and emotional scars from her battle. Some we don’t even know exist yet, I’m sure. Every child we know who has endured chemotherapy has cognitive dysfunction of one type or another, Sarah is no exception. She has physical limitations, though with some hard work we should be able to minimize these. She has emotional struggles that may never go away. She certainly will develop more problems as she grows. Statistically, 90% of children who have received one chemotherapy drug in particular eventually develop a cardiac concern which will require surgical intervention. I hope she is in the 10%, but I need to be prepared (see #1). We will face these battles just like the others as they present themselves. In the meantime see #3.
  5. It is OK to feel. It is ok to be upset, or happy, or angry, or embarrassed, or excited, so long as you are not negatively impacting other individuals. Let me explain: It’s not ok to hurt someone else, but it is ok if they empathize with you. If you are sad and crying and another person feels bad because you feel bad, they are human and are allowed.   There were moments when I was so lost in the flood of emotions I couldn’t see beyond my own bubble (I unconsciously attempted to protect myself by limiting my perception to a short distance effectively rendering me clueless as to the world around me). You have no idea how big emotions can be until you experience it first hand, like tidal waves of emotion, amplified immensely. And the emotions were all filled with enormous guilt. A moment of joy was often accompanied with the thought of the family journeying home for the final time to say good bye to their child while you were celebrating the end of a chemo cycle or finally getting out of the hospital. A moment of sadness was accompanied by the same guilt that you should be glad for what you have. These slishy, sloshy emotions are best dealt with one at a time, allowed to wash over you and to dissipate. Once I began allowing myself to feel my emotions, I gained a much better control over them.
  6. Kids are amazingly resilient. And they bounce. My Sarah was so mad at me (steroids as part of treatment) that I wouldn’t play the movie, she jumped out of bed as I was attempting to get it into the player and push play. She landed on her head and scared the devil out of me. . . And her nurse. . . And the fellows on for the night. . . And probably half the hospital staff. She bounced and got herself a CT scan in the middle of the night which was negative. She was so sick that first year I had day terrors of her death. The month of October 2007 we spent a total of 4—24 hour periods NOT in the hospital (inpatient or clinic appointments). I was terrified and she always smiled.
  7. And those who work with sick kids are not human, they are angels. I cannot thank them enough for all they put up with and did for me in addition to caring for my baby. Each and every one of them, from the front desk staff checking kids in to the cleaning crew to the nurses and doctors, has something different inside that is so admirable.

Obamacare – well played, Mr. President indirect BRAVERY PROJECT

Posted on by lauraanneayres

I almost fell out of love with someone very important to me a few years ago. I really struggled because I gave him so much of my time and attention at the beginning. I even wore T-shirts that had his name on them, put up signs promoting him, and sang at fundraisers. I did everything in my power to make sure everyone else knew how amazing he was. I put years into it.

I’m talking about Barack. Hey, I didn’t say this guy actually knew me. Just that he was important to me. And he still is. Keep reading.

Luckily, I never came close to falling out of love with Michelle. She should be called the First Badass. She is exactly what I would want my little girl (Suzanna Christine – that name is under trademark) to be like.

Anyway, I was starting to fall out of love with her husband. A lack of affordable healthcare, to me, is as much of a human rights violation as Gitmo (also a horrific human rights violation, in my opinion). I was getting frustrated with the promises to deliver on the work earnestly started by the late Senator Kennedy and current next-President of the United States Hillary Clinton (readyforhillary.com GIVE MONEY). Hell’s bells, get it done! It’s the 21st century for pity’s sake. There is a solution for almost every problem. It is inhumane not to help sick people. Full stop.

FINALLY, Obamacare launched and I was thrilled (and back in love). I became more giddy every time I heard about a stupid ACA attack ad in a red state or a website glitch or one of Congress’ attempts to thwart the good work.

Because there is goodness at the heart of this work and I just knew it would work. Haters gotta hate and they usually have a swift kick in the butt at the end of the day, delivered by Auntie Kharma.

The long-term success of Obamacare is not clear. But, I think Obama and Uncle Joe’s press conference let us know: this is working.

Over 7 million people have health coverage. Hell, there is an entire FB page devoted to ACA success stories. That’s enough to be considered a triumph. There will be more problems and it will not be a success story for everyone. Imagine the odds of everyone not being pleased in a country whose population sports a net gain of one person every 15 seconds…I’m #shocked.

No matter what color you are (red or blue) we can all agree it is a good thing when a sick person is given medical attention. 7 million folks now have that option.

God bless the hard work of all of the people who brought this together. And god bless the United States of America.

Well played, Mr. President. This should be a part of my BRAVERY PROJECT.

BRAVERY PROJECT: guest blogger: Chantelle Edwards, “Live to make a difference – the essence of brave”

Posted on by lauraanneayres

I hope all of you find Chantelle’s words as profound as I do. I admire her bravery in sharing them. Follow this project at @BeforeYouBook

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I Am Brave

by: Chantelle Edwards

Wow. That’s something I never thought I would hear myself say. For some reason it doesn’t seem humble, and indeed insignificant. When I place that title on the people that I hold high on my list of role models: Nelson Mandela, Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King; who am I?

Then I read one of my best friends projects where she mentioned the little things that no one knows that you’ve done, that just might change a course of action and inspire someone else. These people took those actions without knowing the outcome and that is the bravery. Yet still I have a problem with that statement, it’s slightly self boasting. As a mother how do I inspire my children to be brave without truly verbalising and showing them what that means? So I write this to my Son and my Daughter, and someday you will read and comprehend that if you are ever deterred on a course of action that is the right path; be brave. Hopefully I am physically there, but even if not, somewhere up there your Mummy is looking down on you, holding your hand through what you know is the right thing to do. It is not about what we think the outcome will be, but who you truly are inside.

My Story

Define who you are

You may both go through times at school where you will be teased and or bullied. I hope not. I remember spending some lunch times in the toilets. I remember the taunts I had for the size of my bust. By the way they will be an asset later on in life. I remember feeling so different I tried to rub off the colour of my skin. It was red raw and the irony was the scar that was left was darker than my skin. In these years you are going to truly discover yourself, embrace yourself and be brave to love you; for who you are. The true beauty will be who you are inside and what you do. My first act of bravery was to accept this, my second act was to step in when another girl was being bullied and save her from a fate that I had experienced before. Stand up for yourself and others.

Define how you act in injustice

I really hope the issues your Daddy and I have faced will not exist; however, at the current pace there will likely still be prejudice due to your ethnicity and for you my daughter your gender. To my son remember you have a mother, sister and hopefully one day maybe even a daughter. Treat every woman with respect and equality. Now back to the bravery point. There have been times when I haven’t got what I needed, wanted or probably deserved because of the colour of my skin or my gender.

Funny episode number one was sending my CV via a friend to a company who apparently loved my CV, but “could I just attach a picture?” This was not necessary in England, but is in Switzerland, and suddenly my CV was no good. When I did have a role being told women are paid less was a big morale breaker. Lesson one: you can choose to react negatively or choose your battles. Your Papa (Granddad) told me “you will have to work harder than everyone else, you may be more educated but you still may not get the job, but keep on going because one day things will change.” He was unfortunately right. Lesson two make sure you get your education it will stand you in good stead and remember generation after generation things change.

 

Funny episode two was the unemployment office telling me I was nothing in Switzerland and was obviously no good. I persevered week after week retrained to work in a new skill, and learned a new language (you already speak four). Moral of this story (lesson three): is that some people may want to put you down, be brave, focus on positive energy and action to change the situation. Know that you are the content of your character, and don’t let someone else’s judgement of your skin colour affect you, do not give them the power. Lesson four, you may need to be flexible and adapt to life and the circumstances: retrain, reskill, move location but you can do anything you put your mind to trust me; I know and see it in the both of you. By the way your Daddy wouldn’t marry me just to get a Visa. He wanted to do it in his own time. So this was a very stressful time. I managed to stay in Switzerland on my own accord and your Daddy asked me to marry him after I got my Visa. Your Daddy is amazing and we married for love. Lesson five make: sure that you marry for love.

Funny or actually not so funny episode 3. As part of my reskilling I trained to teach yoga. Well you’ve probably heard your Daddy complain about my sweaty yoga pants; so this isn’t new. But a long time ago I taught a style called Bikram back in 2013 a number of cases were brought against Bikram which alleged harassment and rape as well as settled out of court cases on racism. There were several accusations where corruption, bullying and unethical behaviour took place. I remember being in a lecture at Teacher Training where the content was that gay people deserve to die from aids, all fat people should be put on one island to starve and a number of degrading comments to women. One: your Mummy stood up in a very cult environment and gave feedback on the quality of the training and unethical content (my heart did race). Two: when the allegations then started to come out I was not silent, despite losing the ability to teach at the studio, and the abuse in the community. I moved on and taught for your aunty Susanne which was bliss and kept my integrity. Lesson six: integrity is everything. There are times where the impact may be negative, but it goes to the very core of who you are, that doing nothing would let injustice prevail. Stand up for what you believe in. Your heart may race but Mummy is there.

Funny Episode 4. In Switzerland to get an apartment you have to put you nationality, what car you drive, religion and actually this may seem normal for you as this is where you were born. Trust me in England this is not the case it is based on can you pay and your previous references. You should see the places where we have lived, but purely because that was all we could get.   I would visit places where there were over a 100 people at the viewing and make an effort to speak to the people in German, but they would look at me with disgust. I was not Swiss and black. Just before you were born my daughter, we actually almost had nowhere to live. We stayed at your aunty Jas’s while I urgently looked for a place to live. I had to write to the prospective landlord and explain that we were going to be like Mary, Joseph and Baby Jesus on the street. The phone never rang so quick; suddenly we had a flat! It used to be the ex-drug lord’s apartment, and even though we both had upper class incomes for Switzerland we were lucky we could get that given my skin colour. After that we bought. I never wanted to go through that again. Lesson number seven: if you ever need anything please obviously come to me, but aunty Jas will also be there for you. Lesson number eight: have good friends just like aunty Jas they are worth their weight in gold. Lesson number nine: try and establish empathy. Okay comparing yourself to Mary, Joseph and baby Jesus is extreme but I was 7 months pregnant and it got into the Swiss psyche. Even if you know the way that they are treating you is unfair, be brave start to get them to think about you as a person, and know you beyond a stereotype. When your Papa (granddad) first came to England they used to have signs “no dogs, not blacks and no Irishmen,” so this was a big leap forward. Bravery is sometimes about the long game and things will change. There are moments where you need to take big steps of bravery, and moment’s small seemingly silent ones that change people’s hearts and minds.

Funny episodes 5 to 15+. Well I have lost the number of times that I have been asked at interview if I’m pregnant? Am I planning to get pregnant? Why I want to work if I have kids and indeed not to work because I have kids! There are not enough fingers and toes for these questions, hence the number of episodes. I choose to work. I choose to use my mind that I had educated, worked on and to make a difference. I hope that you never felt left out. I visited your day care before I made the choice to go back to work, and make sure that it was a place where you would have fun: sledging, building fires in the woods, free play, making friends and learning how to be social. I got up at 5 am in the morning so that I could be there when you come home and wrap my arms around you for cuddles, play puzzles, draw, count, do your ABC’s, bake, play in the paddling pool in the summer, build snowmen in the winter, bath time, read the 5 + books you demand at night with my rapping of verse, Gruffalo voice and Jamaican accent that your aunty makes me put on over Skype for Mama God and Papa God a Caribbean tale. That said bravery is sometimes doing what is the right choice for you and your family even if it is against what society expects. I may be paid less because I am a working Mummy, but just somewhere out there, may be, I give someone hope. I also hope I role model to you my daughter that you have a choice. You can stay at home or work it is up to you both are hard work, and to my son you are ½ Scandinavian you support strong women to have that choice.  Lesson number ten: don’t put anyone down for their choice there is too much in fighting about how people should live their lives, every family is different and they do what is right for their family. Lesson number eleven: do what is right for your family period!

Live to Make a Difference

I guess this is the essence of brave. My whole life has orientated to this point. I am just now about to lead a huge program that affects childhood development globally and start a new business which will make such a difference to people’s lives, giving them more time on the things they love with the people that they love. I am hoping by the time you are reading this I have put in place a legacy that benefits future generations It’s funny even when you were both in my womb I think it was you that taught me to be brave. Somehow you have given me more strength then before. How can I make the world better for you? Every decision is about you and our family. The time we spend together and the happiness we have. So bravery lesson number twelve: whatever your dreams are – go do it, be happy, don’t be afraid and don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t.

So in a way ‘I am Brave’ but somehow we started to have this dialogue before you were even born and you taught me the true meaning of brave.

 

BRAVERY PROJECT: guest blogger: Stephanie Rodousakis – Stephanie’s love letter to Sophia Mina

Posted on by lauraanneayres

Bravery Project: Steph’s one hell of a brave Momma. Follow this project at @BeforeYouBook

lauraanneayres's avatarThe World of Before You

I am honored to feature my friend Stephanie’s blog post. Many of my own followers on social media have prayed for Stephanie, her husband Michael, and their baby girl. Many of you all shed a tear when Sophia Mina was taken from this world. Stephanie has generously allowed me to highlight her thoughts and we are both hoping they will help all of us understand the grief process a little bit better.

On a personal note, I am so proud of the woman, wife, and mother you are, my friend. Thank you for sharing this with my community.

I give you Stephanie’s thoughts and her website (http://sophiamina.wordpress.com)…

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As I reflect on the last 9 months, I think about the victories and the defeats, the smiles and the tears, the anxiety and the relief. So many emotions that filled not only me, but everyone who somehow is a part of…

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BRAVERY PROJECT: Mark Doyle (BBC journalist) writes about bravery

Posted on by lauraanneayres

Mark Doyle (BBC journalist) writes about bravery

Who is brave? Read about: Captain Mbaye Diagne, a United Nations peacekeeper in Rwanda.

Inspirational. “Capt. Mbaye Diagne was in his mid-30s, from a small village in northern Senegal, and a man of immense charm. Tall, gap-toothed and easygoing in Aviator sunglasses, his humour put people at their ease even in one of the darkest chapters of modern history.”

Follow my Bravery Project at @BeforeYouBook

BRAVERY PROJECT – Show me your brave

Posted on by lauraanneayres

Think of the Top Ten bravest people in your daily life. Why do you consider them brave? What constitutes an act of bravery?

We can all point to clear examples of bravery: Malala Yousafzai, normal people stepping in when the Boston marathon bomb went off, the teachers at Sandy Hook, the fire-fighting heroes in West, Harvey Milk, Hillary Clinton & Ted Kennedy, police officers. The list is long and their accomplishments are amazing and awe-inspiring.

Great. What about you?

I’m one of the 10 bravest people I know. It’s not arrogance – I work for that title. I would love to hide in a cubicle, hide in my beautiful flat, hide with the people I already know well. Can’t do it. It isn’t brave. I make it my mission to be on my own top ten list. Things I am not on my own top ten list of include: fashionista, fabulous singer, fabulous writer, etc. Most of my readers know that I am a deeply-flawed gal; however, I am brave.

I fight like hell to be brave. I use my voice, my education, my website, and anything else I can utilize to fight things like poverty, injustice, and ignorance. I speak up for people suffering unjustly. I do not always get heard and rarely get things done exactly the way I want. Not the point.

Here’s the real kicker about bravery: sometimes you fall flat on your face. Sometimes you say words that are hard to say and the other person laughs at you. Sometimes you fight something and you lose the battle (but maybe not the war…go Hillary & Teddy, now we have Obamacare). Here’s the reverse kicker – nothing can diminish brave. Brave is too strong to be diminished by a “no.”

So, what do you decide? Safe walk or bravely blazing a trail?

Start thinking of yourself as brave. Did you start your own company this year? Did you admit to a big mistake? Did you write to a government official? Did you commit yourself to volunteer work? Did you lose 20 pounds? Did you use your website or FB status to really make a thoughtful statement promoting tolerance or education (Mike Mayes and Tony Barrese, y’all always inspire me)? Did you lose a loved one and make it through without becoming a crack addict? All those things might seem “small.” I assure you, there is bravery within each of them.

I’ve never ever seen on-the-spot bravery announced with glitter and rainbows. Not once. Bravery doesn’t look like much to most people, it’s something you do that makes you, sorry curse word-haters, scared shitless.

I just came from my sanctuary in Luzern where I heard something amazing, “Only deep inside of you can you hear who you really are.” There is a small voice inside of all of us calling us to be…brave. So, do it. If you need inspiration, I love this song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwTr_CRw3GY What a fantastic message. “I just wanna see you be brave.” (Songwriters: BAREILLES, SARA / ANTONOFF, JACK Brave lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC)

Anyone who has a story of bravery, I don’t care if you saved a child or an opera company or 50 bucks…whatever you think “brave” is, share your story somewhere. You can be a guest blogger for me. You can post it on my FB page (Before You). Post it on your own. Be bold.

Show me…how big your brave is. Follow this project at @BeforeYouBook